We both came to the conclusion that when it comes to marriage, we can't hold on to resentment. It destroys relationships like nothing else really quickly.
So although it can be extremely hard at times, life is more simple and joyful when we can just let go completely of the past, and forgive fully. We are all so imperfect. We all make mistakes and have regrets. We must forgive as we'd like to be forgiven.
I love my eternal sweetheart and know he does his best to fulfill his responsibilities each day. He is a great man, and if I choose to, I can find great joy in looking at him from a larger perspective than the here and now of weakness and strength combined.
When I choose to, his weaknesses and faults can grow until I think I married a monster. It's about choices. What voices we choose to heed that bring joy or misery in marriage.
I am so THANKFUL for my husband! For all that he is and all that I can see in his future with ME. He is a pretty darn good guy all around-and my equal in more ways I'm discovering, we were truly prepared for each other and continue to grow. I need to continue to let go of things I've been holding onto, and move forward in faith. The fear and faith thing...again. My future already seems more bright.